An adoption profile can tell you plenty of things about hopeful adoptive parents. But it can’t tell you everything.
Don’t forget they wrote it, so the information will be selective, designed to show them in the best light possible.
In order to fill in the gaps and get a more complete picture, you’ll need to ask them questions. No doubt you’ll have a host of your own. Here are some of ours to help you break the ice and get started.
- Tell me about yourselves – how did you first meet?
- What originally attracted you to each other?
- How would you describe yourselves?
- What are some of the things you like to do?
- Do you have other children?
- Do you have any pets?
- Tell me about the rest of your family.
- What kind of neighbourhood do you live in?
- Describe what a typical day is like for you?
- What made you decide to adopt?
- Do you have any family members or friends who have adopted or are adopted?
- What does the rest of your family think about your adoption plans?
- What do you think makes a good parent?
- How do you and your partner handle disagreements?
- What kind of work do you do?
- How long do you plan to stay at home with the baby?
- Do you plan to return to work?
- What kind of child care arrangement will you have when you’re back at work?
- Are you religious?
- What are your plans for your child’s education?
- How will you explain adoption to your child?
- What kind of relationship are you interested in having with me after the adoption?
- Are you working with any other expectant parents?
- Would you like to meet?
- Can I contact your adoption worker if I have any other questions?
- Are there any questions you want to ask me?
Here are some questions you may want to ask, but probably shouldn’t. They are better coming from someones else such as your adoption worker or a friend.
- Why can’t you have children of your own?
- I’m having trouble making ends meet. How can you help me during my pregnancy?
- How do I know I can trust you?
Asking hopeful adoptive parents personal questions about themselves can get tricky. But it’s an important part of the process. What they say and how they say it will give you a better idea whether they’re right for you and your baby.
In order to get an even better picture of them before the placement, be sure to meet them and have your adoption worker or a trusted friend or family member come along with you for added support.